Highlights from the Winnipeg Workshop

Building Esteem and Confidence

Review by Carol Marshall  

What a wonderful topic for a workshop! Who couldn’t use more Esteem and Confidence in their lives?  We had an excellent turn out for the Thursday evening.  As a group we were open and ready to receive some insight and information.

As the evening unfolded, several participants shared with Kelly how and where they felt blocked.  We discovered that a lack of confidence can hold us back, and that some if not all of our limiting beliefs can stifle us.

Some of our barriers and blocks went as far back as childhood, and our family beliefs.  We can have self-judgment, and compare ourselves to others, and often time just don’t feel good enough.

Some team members shared inspiring stories of how Kelly’s workshops have touched and changed their lives for the better.  Over the years of being involved with Kelly’s workshops, each team member recognized how much they have grown, feeling more confident in themselves.  Kelly’s workshops have impacted them greatly, and they continue to receive insight and wisdom every time they attend one of Kelly’s workshops or retreats.  This was a magnificent start to an amazing weekend.

Part of Friday evening was getting to know each other and ourselves better.  We worked on building a safe strong container for the whole group.  Then created some small groups and choose cards to help us get in touch.  The cards Kelly uses always amaze me.  We each chose a challenge card, way through card, and a gift card.

Yes once again my cards were fitting and appropriate for me.  All I can say is wow.

Saturday was full of self-reflection.  One of the processes was centred on losses.  We uncovered that at times with the loss of past relationships we may lose a percentage of ourselves that remains subconsciously entangled.  Kelly asked us to have a look at our relationships and to make note of what percentage of ourselves have we lost in each one.  Some participants realized they had lost large percentages of themselves.

We started the process of recovering ourselves so there will be more to show up in present or future relationships.

Kelly’s brilliant guidance, along with his support for the whole group gently moved us towards the realization that with the helplessness triggered by our losses, an anger is activated (whether expressed or denied).

Kelly shared ways we can work with our anger. How to deal with our anger and move through it with the intent for healing.  We explored areas that we felt anger and did an amazing powerful exercise with anger.  After this exercise I felt so much lighter.  I felt like a heavy weight had been lifted from my shoulders.

We were then open to grieving our losses. We grieved the loss of the relationships, and the parts of ourselves we lost while in relationship. Emptying the grief created a sense of safety that we could handle it as well as space to receive the next level of connection in relationships.

On Sunday we learnt about passive – assertive – and aggressive behavior and how it relates to our level of self-esteem.  I was surprised to discover, that a person who comes across with an aggressive attitude doesn’t necessarily have a high level of confidence.  It can be the opposite actually.  Aggression can be mask to cover the low self-esteem that is underneath.

We had a look at how we present ourselves.  Do we generally come from a place of being passive or aggressive?  How can we be more assertive?  Later that evening our small groups had a chance to put together a skit for the other groups.  We choose characters that would display different characteristics of passive, aggressive and assertive.  Kelly suggested that we explore acting out one of the characteristics that we don’t usually use in our daily life.  For example, if you tend to be more passive you might want to have your character be more aggressive.

Everyone had great skits, filled with lots of humor and fun!  We should really start our own Kelly Tobey traveling show.

There is so much more I could tell you, and share with you.  The weekend was incredible!!!  I have learnt so much and I am grateful for the experience.  I appreciate Kelly’s intuition.  Kelly your gifts and talents are a true blessing to all of us.

Thanks to the beautiful team members who put their heart and soul into the weekend.  Making it a powerful, safe, and loving workshop for all.  Last but definitely not least.  Thank you to all the participants who attended.  You trusted the process, and I know how hard that can be at times. 

Hope to see you all in April for our next Winnipeg workshop.  Or maybe I will see you even sooner.  I will be attending the 2011 Summer Retreat, so perhaps I will see some or all of you then.

Cheers, smiles and peace to you all!!!!!!!