The
Art of Being ME: Finding True Self in a Hectic World
We began Thursday evening by discussing some
of the reasons we originally disconnect from self.
As children, we are dependent upon our caregivers for our
physical needs as well as our needs for attention, love and approval.
We quickly learn and then adopt those behaviours that please our
caregivers. In the process
we typically stop listening to our heart and our intuition.
For the purpose of survival, we make receiving our needs more
important than remaining true to our essence.
We forget who we really are.
Later, we use this same strategy with teachers, coaches, friends
and partners.
Through a question and answer session, we
discovered some ways to begin reclaiming our essence. Setting
openhearted boundaries with those to whom we have given away self is one
step in reclamation. Being
willing to feel the grief we carry from years of being out of touch with
our essence is also helpful. Learning
to check with our heart and intuition regarding life’s decisions helps
us remember and reclaim true self.
Friday evening we discussed guidelines for the
weekend and spent time connecting with each other for the purpose of
creating a safe environment in which to expose and explore our essence.
We began to examine some blocks that stand in the way of
reclaiming self; impoverished self concept, un-grieved loss, betrayal
and self-betrayal, self punishment, approval addiction and fear of the
results of success.
Saturday we completed a survey to help us
become aware of the priorities of our true self.
We compared these priorities to our actual behaviours.
In small groups we discussed those areas where our actions are
most out of line with our essence.
We received feedback and wisdom from our group members regarding
ways to reduce this discrepancy.
A creative, sensitive, man then shared his
experience helping us to realize that we often have more gifts and
blessing in our lives than we are aware of, we have made more changes
and improvements than we may have acknowledged, and our challenges or
obstacles are not always as large and immovable as we may think.
Sunday we undertook a journaling activity
aimed at discovering our life’s purpose.
By looking at the character traits of people we admire, we
developed a list of elements of our purpose.
We discussed how we can express this purpose in many areas of our
lives. We noted the number of these elements expressed in our work,
hobbies, relationships, studies, service work, playtime, family, etc.
This information was useful in helping us understand which parts of our
lives are “on purpose” and which parts may call for change.
We then explored the “stuck” feeling
sometimes encountered when attempting to step more fully into true self.
We decided that it may be useful to develop a checklist to help
us determine whether our actions are in line with our purpose and
express our essence. Referring
frequently to this list can help insure that we do not wander far from
our purpose for a great length of time.
We also discussed the value of having a support system of people
who are willing to remind us when we stray.